Coffeebration

In chronological order, here are some of my entries from April – June 2002. They’re also over in the archives section. Many of the entries contain pictures that go along with the events that took place. Just read the titles … obviously I was a lot more exciting back in the day when I had roommates and a boyfriend …. or just a life. Anyways, I really put forth some effort into these. I was 20 in April 2002 ….. it seems like these things just happened yesterday, others I feel like were a lifetime ago and written by someone else. Some fun times were definitely had.

APRIL 2002:
The one with the CrossXRoads Mugs
The one with the secret Gin Blossoms Concert
The one with the Wooden Meat Mallet
The one with the ugly neighbor
The one with the Dead Girlfriend
The one where I rant about eggrolls
The Gin Blossoms Concert

May 2002:
My first post livin’ in da Burgh
The one with fake engagement pictures
The one where I have a boyfriend!

JUNE 2002:
The one where Courtney stole my fan and then cut off all of my hair!
Why is there a knife in our bathroom?
Long ass reflection on my life
Very unorganized post which also contains a time machine

Where would I be in life today without the internet? I really don’t know. I love information at the tips of my fingers but I still get frustrated about the lack of things I’m able to find. It’s not perfect … yet. I wish I got paid to find things on the internet …. I have so many great techniques. Here is a list of great things I have accomplished on the internet.

1. Nights of entertainment, searching through free criminal records of people I went to high school with.
(reason: curiosity I guess. Wondering if the jerks in high school really made it anywhere, or if they are rotting in a jail cell somewhere.)

2. Finding MySpace blogs of people I went to high school with.
(reason: curiosity, boredom)

3. Endless mindgames played on people (Julie as my partner in crime) via fake AIM screen-names and fake identities. I was once a boy named Jason who just happened to “accidentally” email my ex-boyfriends new girlfriend. Oh and Jason just happened to know my ex-boyfriend. Soon we had a flourishing online relationship and courtesy of her best-pals email, I found out she was seriously contemplating on meeting me in real life. I’d had my fun …. I let things end.
(reason: revenge, jealousy, anger, a way to curb my desire to stab certain individuals)

4. I met Todd
(reason: lonlieness, boredom, curiosity, hoping to find someone)

5. I made many websites
(reason: everyone else was doing it … seemed fun, now I’m addicted!)

6. I found out my landlord wasn’t paying his taxes and realized the house I was living in was going up for sherrif’s sale. As of May 2005 it was bought for $6,000 by some company in California. This knowledge saved me from potentially being homeless although I highly doubt I would have stayed much longer than I ended up staying anyways. It kind of sucked there.
(reason: investigation upon finding notices that gas was being shut off, coming home to find I had no cable, endless calls from bill collectors on the main line at the house)

7. I know who has babies and have read many obituaries.
(reason: curiosity)

8. By use of keylogger I found out my ex-boyfriend’s email password, went into his email, slightly modified his lover’s email address in his address book, set up an email account at that modified address, and waited. Two days later I recieved an email from him to “her” stating that he was sorry she was upset that he was seeing “me” again but I had just bought him a Blink 182 ticket and he really wanted to go so he had to pretend to like me. Yeah, the truth hurts and sometimes you think you are better off not knowing, but I’ve learned that when you feel wrong about something, there is usually something really wrong about it. Needless to say, he didn’t make it to that concert.
(reason: just confirming my worst fear. Unfortunately I was right. Unfortunately if I hadn’t sought the truth in such a sneaky way I would still to this day never really know that I was being lied to. Some men are good liars even when you think you know everything about them. 3 years ….. wasted ….. think twice before you claim to know someone.)

9. Many lovely IM conversations that still make me spit out my coffee when I read them.
(reason: boredom, entertainment)

10. Found out that this crazy guy who used to call me at work everyday is truly crazy. Now you know I’m not lying when I say that “nuts” call me at work. He wanted us to assist him in getting a citizenship in another country and we got a background check on him and found out he wasn’t even allowed to leave the state. But he still kept calling … he finally gave up after police were brought into the picture. I guess his backup plan didn’t pan out very well either.
(reason: just by chance … it was a headline in the paper)

So yes, the internet is a great place. And perhaps you understand my reservations about revealing much on this website …. how am I to know that some psycho who calls me at work, or some scorned lover wouldn’t come across me and find some really good way to fuck with me … I mean, I’ve done it.

Last night Todd and I were having a discussion about webpages and CSS while I was being useless in helping him figure out why his page was messed up since I really don’t understand percentages or anything really about CSS except I know that the way I do it works and thats all I know. Anyways, he went back to his webpage from like 1995 on AOL and was like, this was all hand-coding! I was like, yeah the good ol’ days before I discovered movable type, wordpress, and CSS. There was no such thing as a template, I just made everything with Microsoft Publisher and it looked good! Which made me think back to the webpages I’ve made before. Curiosity got the best of me so I searched through my computer and found my old page I made when I went to Pitt. Some of you might remember this:

And upon further investigation I found all of my entries from April – December 2002! I completely forgot that I was creating html pages for my journal before I discovered livejournal. Prior to the page above, I had a Diaryland journal in 2001, which has been deleted and purged. Same thing with my LiveJournal entries from January – August 2003. So, people …. don’t use online diaries because you’ll never get your stuff back. Now they have fancy import / export tools with just about all blogging programs, and since Livejournal was bought by Sixapart its a lot more like movabletype, etc. But this was way before any of that went down. Anyways, if you look closesly above you can see that the entry is actually from February 2003 because I was doing this thing with LiveJournal where it would automatically crosspost something to my website when I updated LiveJournal. However, my webpage did not create an html page of this because it would just overwrite the entry on the main page each time I updated and then give a link to LiveJournal as the source for the rest of the entry. So anyways, I’m going to work tonight on uploading a select number of worthy entries from April – December 2002 into my archives on this site. Most of it is about how cool Todd is, how cute he is, and how much I love him … since we met in May 2002 and I was just a drooling lovesick dork for most of the year. It also chronicles my move to Pittsburgh from Indiana, learning how to ride the bus, and learning that Pittsburgh is a scary place to live when you grew up in a town with a population of 3,000. Yay!!!

I want a scanner and I want one now. I have oodles of pictures that I just feel like scanning for no real reason. I just have it in my head that I need one. Anyways, I was at Best Buy earlier today and was all about buying one until I saw that the cheapest one was $132. I’m kind of a cheap person and I don’t like to spend money on things I don’t really need, and $132 for a scanner doesn’t fit into my spending plan at the current moment. I really don’t need a scanner that will read 35mm film negatives or scan my picture with such a great resolution that I could take it over to Kinko’s and have a full sized poster made out of it. I just want a crappy scanner. I bought a scanner back in 1998 for $96 at WalMart, but technological advances killed my scanner and even after visiting the manufacturer website multiple times and downloading new software for it, it just absolutely refuses to work with any operating system higher than Windows 98. I’m pretty computer savvy too …. Its just dead, and there is no making it work with my computer. I don’t even know where it is anymore. I guess its probably at my parents house somewhere collecting dust.

I also wanted to buy some gadgets that will allow me to transfer VHS tapes onto my computer to make DVD’s. I saw some VHS to DVD recorders in the $200 – $250 range, but if I really want to work on all of my parents home videos I need something that will record onto my hard-drive for editing. Our home videos need some editing. For instance – the time my dad recorded the humming-bird feeder for a whole hour waiting for a humming bird, or the time I was watching home videos with some friends in high school and after the shot of me dancing around the house and making fun of my brother, a clip from a porno came on the screen briefly before switching over to the next home video. Taping over things doesn’t erase them! So .. I need some editing equipment in order to make some quality DVD’s for future generations to enjoy.

Todd talked me into purchasing a battery backup UPS thing today. Actually he has been selling me on one ever since time began, and especially since my computer hard-drive died this summer during a power surge during a storm. I just assumed that my awesome new 3ghz computer couldn’t die. I bought it in February so its only 7 months old … and was only 5 months old when it exploded. So I guess having some backup in case of power-failure is a good idea, even though I still have my broken hard-drive sitting on my kitchen table. Since I know exactly how to stick it back in the computer and run the illegal data-recovery software I found online … well I figured that I could resort to that if I absolutely had to. I just hate spending money on practical things that I can’t get immediate gratification from. UPS = no fun. Scanner = fun!

I do have means of backing things up. I have a cd burner, a dual layer dvd burner, and I think I have Norton Ghost and I could burn an image of everything ….. but alas I’m a lazy fool. I would cry for days on end if I really lost all of my pictures and things I have written, funny IM conversations I’ve had, and the stupid pictures Todd has drawn in Paint. I’m not worried about my programs because they are the one thing I have backed up on CD. Now if I had actually purchased programs I’d have the original installation CD’s but of course everything I have is not exactly legal. Oh well, at least I’m not out shooting people or causing riots.

Todd made hot-dogs on the grill today and they were much much better than my hot-dog from 7-11 on Labor Day. I ate two of them and still feel pretty full and that was hours ago. Not eating sure makes you get full faster when you do eat! At one point I probably could have eaten 4 of them. And over the summer we had lots of cookouts and I would eat a huge hamburger and a hot dog and usually something else. Yes, I’m a piggie. I was also rejoicing in my “I eat beef again” phase since I refused to eat hamburger meat or anything from a cow for like six months. I was on an anti-pork thing for a while too. And unless it is lunchmeat or prepared by a restaurant or Todd, the only thing meaty that I cook around here is pepperoni on pizza or chicken breasts. Or turkey TV dinners! I think that Healthy Choice and Lean Cuisine need to come out with an “Ultimate Thanksgiving” TV dinner. I’d be quite happy if they did.

I’m tired and kind of grumpy right now. I feel weird because I was up until 6am and slept until 1:30pm. Now that is something I haven’t done in a while. Well when I was panic ridden I would tend to be unable to fall asleep until 7am, but usually had to be somewhere by 9am so I’d do my thing and come home and pass out for hours. But since I’ve been working a regular job I’ve been mostly sleeping normal hours and even on the weekends, I’m always up by 11am at the latest. I used to love to sleep in, but now when I do I just feel like I’m wasting my day. I guess I have a new found apprecation for “time” since I realized how little of it there is when you work all day and live in a cave at night. Aahh ….. this has been a great rant.

Bye!

Even though Julie beat me to it on her site, our great-grandmother made the paper! Names mentioned also include Julie’s grandmother, my grandmother, and my mom! Woohoo mom, you’re famous! And thanks to Kim I’m posting the picture too 😛

Click HERE to read all about my awesome great-grandmother and my awesome family. Yeah, I’m breaking away from the norm in revealing real life names and such, but this is a special occassion! Not many people get to experience the joy of turning 103!

Up until two days ago I thought that I absolutely HAD to have lettuce on my sandwiches. I can’t just slap some lunchmeat between some bread and call it a sandwich. I need that extra crunch and something to absorb the vinegar and oil I’m bound to squirt all over it. But when I buy sandwich making ingredients I’m either forced to buy an entire head of lettuce or shredded lettuce in a tiny bag that usually costs twice as much as a whole head of lettuce. I usually buy the whole head, but then I’m compelled to eat salad every single day for the next week or let my surplus lettuce rot. So the other day when I went to the grocery store I decided that I was boycotting lettuce. Instead I chose to purchase a bag of coleslaw – the dry cabbage stuff. I knew that Primanti Bros. sandwiches were good so I decided to give the coleslaw a try on my ham and cheese sandwich. It is really like the best discovery of the year. I’m in love with crunchy cabbage and turkey / ham sandwiches. No more lettuce, ever. Oh and I bought swirly bread … the rye and pumpernickel. The best bread EVER. I’m so happy. Exciting stuff huh?

Elaborating on my last entry that was one sentence long goes kind of like this: I was doing ok despite everything, but one stupid thing happened and I contemplated walking outside with a sharp knife and stabbing the first annoying person to walk by …. I was getting over being sick and was up to my eyeballs in work the past two weeks because we are having a kick-off event to launch our new initiative (heh). We ordered, literally, thousands of shirts, maps, posters, stickers, and other promotional crap. On top of managing all of the incoming crap, we’re trying to plan an entire weeks worth of events and I just want it to be over. And then the day before yesterday I had a relapse or something, and now I have a sore throat, chills, and think I might have a touch of the flu. And missing work isn’t an option, really … I know my health comes first but if I’m not there things aren’t going to happen. Not to sound like I’m the president of the world, I’m not, but I can’t be sick right now. I’ve literally been running around like a chicken with my head cut off, not eating, not sleeping well, and I’m just burning out. But I was ok. I was just dealing with it and not getting too upset. I felt that I was in control.

THEN, the other morning I woke up and started my usual ritual of turning on the coffeemaker and jumping in the shower. No big deal. After my shower I dressed myself and headed back to the kitchen to retrieve my coffee. It was dark and I picked up the pot but it felt empty. I thought “crap, I forgot to put water in, I really must be losing my mind.” So I turned on the light and discovered that my coffee was all over the kitchen counter, soaked through a towel, and dripping onto the floor. I was mad but I really wanted coffee so I cleaned it all up and attempted to make the coffee again. Same thing started happening, total coffeemaker meltdown which in turn caused me to have a nervous breakdown …. and everything that had been making me nuts the past few weeks just started flooding in and I wanted to punch a wall or stab someone. It was seriously the worst day and I couldn’t even sum it up into one reason that I was mad. It was like having PMS, except worse. And it wasn’t withdrawal from coffee because I just stopped and got some on my way to work. It just set me off.

So, I’ve been pretty cranky due to the fact that I’ve been sick for like a month it seems and I’m overwhelmed at work. And then when I come home I don’t even have the luxury of being an alcoholic to drown my sorrows in. Instead I come home and drink another cup of coffee so I don’t pass out and get mad at myself when I wake up at 11pm, starving, too late to buy food, no food in the fridge … go back to sleep, wake up in the morning and do it all over again. Ughh. Sometimes its coffee, most times its the sleep. I just hate being sick. And I always feel 10x worse the minute I walk into my apartment. Perhaps there is poison here. I sound like a depressed loser, don’t I?

I don’t know why its always so hard to think of something good happening in my life. Well, there was the thing about the coleslaw and my tasty new bread. And due to circumstances that prevent me from eating, such as work, no food in the fridge, being too cheap to order food, and just the desire not to eat, I’ve lost 9 pounds in the past few weeks, which brings my new weight to six pounds below my beach weight. I gained three back after the beach because I stopped exercising and ate a lot of pizza. As of this morning I am now 134 pounds and quite proud of it. For some people that might be skinny, but when you are barely 5’3 and all of your extra weight likes to hang out in your stomach and butt, then its not so skinny. I don’t really have a target because I don’t remember ever feeling good about my weight, except for the time I went to the prom in 11th grade. I think I was around 120 pounds, so maybe that is the long term goal. I just have to stop eating pizza. I stopped eating french fries though – except when I went out with Julie, Nate & company last Friday. I had a huge plate of cheesy french-fries. I was having a really bad day though … so I indulged.

Today I interviewed someone, which I have done a few times before, but today it was weird because I was actually the one asking all the questions and I didn’t think it was going to be like that. After running around since 7:30 this morning, it was 11am before I knew it and I had an appointment with this kid from an agency that we recruit people from sometimes, kind of like internships for people with psychological problems who are really smart but can’t handle a regular job. The meeting was with the HR lady, myself, the kid, and the lady from the agency. Well I was pretty unprepared for the interview because people had been coming in all morning, so I ran upstairs and grabbed a job description I had written for the last person we were supposed to hire and ran off to the interview. So anyways, it was ok …. I liked him because he has computer skills which is like imperative where I work. He had been writing the newsletters for some place and went to college and got a degree in computers and art. I really need some relief upstairs because I’m working with three people in two different departments and planning events and just going nuts, but the stipulation to hiring someone is that I’m in charge of their work. This makes me sound like I have my own personal assistant, but if I really did … they would hire someone permanently and someone who doesn’t have special needs … oh and I’d make more money. But the fact that I’m being given enough credit to manage someone like that gives me some feeling of satisfaction. Anyways, its time consuming to train people and have them do things the way you want them done. Like, its almost easier if you just do it yourself. I just hope he’s a quick learner. But anyways, I’m excited about it. He’s starting on Monday.

It’s ok with me and don’t ask me why, but I’m really good at getting along and relating to people with these problems. Maybe its because I’m crazy myself – who knows … but I swear that people with schizophrenia or a similar disorder are pretty cool in my book. The last guy we had there had a disorder that was kind of schizophrenia but I don’t think he heard voices. He was just kind of paranoid and had a lot of worries and anxiety (hey, that’s me!) No … really it was obvious he was really nervous about everything. Anyways, everyone just treated him like he was a kid and talked down to him. Or they would be really fake when talking to him, and just because you have a mental problem does not mean you are retarded or that you are a moron! He knew he was being talked down to and I just think its rude. You don’t have to pretend that a problem does not exist with someone like that. I liked to talk to him about his feelings and I tried to relate, which in many cases I could. He had gone to Princeton and was really intelligent, but sadly I don’t think that anyone even knew that.

Anyways, I’m going to end my ranting. That’s a summary of what is going on in my ever so exciting life. I’m just happy its the weekend. Goodbye.

I’m not happy and I don’t want to talk about it. That’s a first.

Watching the Hurricane Katrina news on television, I can’t help that I still find those southern accents quite funny. They pronounce Louisiana “Looziana” where as I always said “Laweeziana”. And New Orleans is “New Orlinz” and I say “New Orleenz”. It makes me think about this girl in high school from Texas. In 7th grade we ate lunch at 10:10am. Yeah it sucked, but our cafeteria was small and the 7th graders got the undesirable lunch time slot. Anyways, we loved to ask her “Hey what time is lunch?” cause she would respond “Duh its at Tin Tin”. And we also made fun of the way she said cement pond because she would pronounce it “see-ment pond”. I don’t even know why the heck anyone was talking about cement ponds back then, what the heck is a cement pond anyways? My coworker who is a few years older than me grew up in Texas but she doesn’t even have a hint of a southern accent. Apparently she has northernized herself. I just want her to bust out in a southern accent so I can laugh, but nope …. she sounds like she belongs right here in PA. Although when I moved to Ohio for a whole three months, apparently I developed some kind of odd accent. I didn’t know there was an Ohio accent, but a lot of people over there were from Michigan and Indiana, so maybe it was like a central US accent. I never noticed it but when my parents came to visit they asked what the heck was wrong with me. I did develop the tendency to say “rhullercoaster” but really thats not so dramatic.

I’ve already learned that its still cool to say “dude” constantly since I’ve heard at least five college girls going “dude oh my God” in the last few days. I used to say “dude” constantly. I think I picked it up from my friend Ashley, but I’m not sure. Probably just cause everyone else said it. Now I mostly hang out with old people at work so I don’t really say “dude” or “like oh my God” anymore. At least I don’t think I do. And if I do its definitely not excessive because I used to catch myself saying those things all the time and I could actually hear how dumb I sounded but couldn’t make myself stop.

Don’t think I’m not unique though. I have had many phrases in the past that I used excessively without influence. They were all mine! Such as “I swallowed a fish and it farted in my throat”, “you smell like a gerbil”, “i feel like poop on a stick”, and the list goes on. Poop on a stick might not be original, but I guarantee the first two are. I still like to say “you smell like a gerbil”. I don’t say it at work though. I have to be professional and use words such as “significant dollars”, “enclosed please find”, and “finalizing the details for our new initiative”. At work, everything is an initiative, and everything is significant. Sometimes I want to rip out tongues so I never have to hear either word again. My boss totally overuses significant. I think I’m going to get on her computer and put “significant” into the Microsoft Word replacement thing so everytime she types it, it will change to poop, tangerine, or monkey feces. Heh, that would be funny. I mean she already swears her computer is possessed since she can never save or print, or copy and paste. Yet, when I drag my ass in there it works fine. I think someone needs to go back to Computers 101. So if it happened, she would just think its a virus, since everything is a virus.

Words are great, aren’t they. I just managed to write a whole page about them. Give me a topic, any topic and I can ramble on about it forever. It’s great, isn’t it?

So, to my surprise, www.ihatemen.com is real and its funny as hell. I thoroughly enjoyed reading the dating horror stories. After reading them I think I have concluded that the number #1 sign that a guy has lost interest is his knack for making up ridiculous stories or just neglecting to call you for weeks at a time. I thought that this was something that most women already knew ….. but I guess when you are in love its just tough to see the light. But if its only been like two dates, come on. Who wants to be with a coward like that anyways although I have to admit that I’ve probably done the same thing. Face it girls, its a fact …. guys are pussy cowards and would rather string girls along until the end of time rather than to having to actually break it off. They’ll just continue giving lame excuses until their face turns blue. So after reading this, I have been inspired to compile my dating horror stories. But since I ramble I’m just going to list all of my relationships that lasted more than two days … and I’m going to try REAL hard to stay focused here.

Mr. A: Met him in high school marching band in 7th grade. My friend had a huge crush on him but he liked me and I guess I wasn’t such a good friend. Anyways, he invited me to go along with him and his parents to see some kind of symphony that ended up being the most boring thing in the world. We never actually kissed but he tried to stick his hand down my pants while we were sitting together on the band bus, covered with a blanket. I pushed him away and he never really talked to me again.

Mr B: Met him in 8th grade. He was the older brother of a friend of mine and I thought he was cute. So as it usually goes, word got out that I thought he was cute and he decided to ask me on a date. My dad dropped us off at the mall and we went and ate at McDonald’s. After such a wonderful dining experience, we walked across the street towards the movie theater and he stopped right in front of the grocery store and kissed me. Yep, my very first real kiss was in the parking lot of a grocery store. We went to the movies and saw “Dumb and Dumber”. The date was ok and we continued to see each other for about two months. During Valentines Day and I went all out and bought him this really fancy card, two bags of his favorite candy and a Pgh Penguins t-shirt. What did I get? I got a plastic rose. Yep, plastic. Anyways, about a month later his friend passed along a note from him that said “I don’t really like you and I’m too good for you, blah blah”. I’m sure I still have that note somewhere, should have burned it. Asshole didn’t even have the guts to break up with me to my face.

Mr. C: We met in 9th grade and I have no idea how because he was two years younger than me and we shared no classes in school. Anyways, we basically just made out a lot and I went to a “Festival of Lights” thing during the Christmas season with his family and he insisted on making out with me in the backseat during the almost two hour trip there. His family was white trash and his dad was encouraging and cheering him on as he made out with me. Anyways, he just turned out to be a liar in just about every respect. He would just say random things that were obviously not true, but he would insist that they were. He wanted to go to the Snowball with me but at that point I was too embarrassed to even be seen with him anymore. His mom bought me a Mickey Mouse corkboard for Christmas but I don’t think our relationship lasted into the New Year. He was a freak that smelled funny and sadly I had to end our relationship.

Mr D: Again, another bad choice during the summer between 9th and 10th grade. He lived on a farm and had a million zits on his face. We got caught by the cops making out in the park. My mom hated him and told me she would disown me if I kept seeing him. My dad called him pizza face. He was really boring. I wrote him a note, breaking up with him after about a month. At least I handed it to him in person.

Mr E: This was the first BIG relationship, as in it lasted close to four years, maybe more … I can’t keep track after all the times we broke up. We met in 10th grade. A friend of a friend kind of thing I guess. We were both in band but we weren’t actually friends. One day my contact came out of my eye and I was attempting to put it back in at my locker and scurry back to class. He approached me, and while standing there with a beat red eye, he asked me to the Snowball. Of course, being the geek I was, I had no real prospects so I said ok. I never really liked him and thought he was a dork, so I basically ignored him for that entire month up until the Snowball. So we went to the Snowball and danced and he asked me to be his girlfriend. Maybe I was horny from all that close dancing, I don’t know, but I said yes and immediately regretted it. For the first few months we just sat in my girlfriends basement and made out a lot. We had nothing to talk about. Eventually something caught on because I fell in love with the asshole and was with him up until my sophomore year of college. We actually broke up several times before that though. The first time we broke up was due to a fight my junior year which led to me cheating on him. Exactly one year later we broke up again after a fight where i attempted to throw a glass ashtray at his head, missing by about an inch as we watched it shatter on my wall. This was right after my high school graduation and it was summer and he went to an Eagle Scout camp for two weeks the day after the fight. I thought it would be a good break so we could both cool off, but the day he returned he was flaunting a new girlfriend around town. I never took the fight that seriously, so of course I was heartbroken. He broke up with her and I took him back during the beginning of my freshmen year of college. Soon after that we broke up again and he started dating another girl. They eventually broke up too, I think she dumped him for smoking too many cigarettes and too much pot. So it was on and off for a while, till I finally gave him the boot after reading an email to on of his ex’s about how he was just using me because I bought him some Blink 182 tickets. Yeah, this one makes me look like a desperate loser. He has a kid now, probably still smokes pot 24/7 …. and I really didn’t need that bag of bones anymore. He looked like a refugee from Ethiopia and I’m better off without him. We had different goals in life anyways.

Mr. F: So I had moved away to Ohio hoping to finally forget about Mr. E. I was working at Cedar Point and was having a great time. There was this kid, really dorky actually … and he liked me for some reason. I felt bad and finally gave in to going on a date with him. He acted so sweet as a friend, but once we went out all he wanted to do was molest me. One night he asked me to sleepover at his apartment so I said ok, especially because it was HOT in my apartment that I shared with 8 other girls, and he had air-conditioning. So I went over and he busted out his stash of condoms and asked me if I would have loud and wild passionate sex with him. He wanted me to “scream so everyone in the building would hear us having sex”. I wasn’t really down with that, so I just said no and decided to go back home. One week later I found out he was screwing some other girl at work, and soon he was going around bragging about how many women he had bagged that summer. So I was glad I got out when I did.

Mr. G: This one is funny too. So my sophomore year of college I met this really sweet guy. He was a friend of a friend and we would party together a lot. My roommate was in love with him, but he seemed to like me … so again back to 7th grade, I decided I didn’t really care if she liked him. My roommate smoked crack anyways, yeah she really did. Anyways, one night I stayed over at my friends house and he was there too. He decided he was too tired to drive home and that he was going to have to share the bed with me. Since I had like a huge crush on him, I did not object. So we fooled around a little bit, just kissing and touching and I left the next day not knowing what to think. That night my friend had a party and he was there. He asked me to be his girlfriend so I said yes. He seemed like the perfect guy and I was doing the happy dance, well for like a day. After that party I did not hear from him for two days. I finally messaged him and asked him to hang out that night but he said he was going to be at work late and then he was going out for drinks with his buddy Joe. Ok, well Joe was gay …. and his bestfriend. I had a hint of suspicion about their friendship, but I wasn’t going to accuse my boyfriend of being gay! He certainly didn’t seem gay, and my friend that hooked us up swore on her life that he was NOT GAY. A few days after that he IM’d me and said he couldn’t be with me anymore because there were a lot of things he had to work out in his life. He wouldn’t elaborate. So we kind of remained friends by acquaintance but that was it. A few months later a bunch of us all went to Canada, got real drunk, and Mr. G made out with my friend Kimmy right in front of me in our hotel room. I was mostly over him by then, and decided that it wasn’t really worth getting pissed about. A few months after that, I found out he had a boyfriend and was just using Kimmy and I to figure out if he could like girls. He’s still on my AIM list and I don’t talk to him, but I know that he’s been in a wonderful relationship with a great guy, Chris, for about two years now. Congrats to him. I still get made fun of to this day about it … hearing “You turned him gay!” Yep, thats me … I have the ability to turn one gay.

Mr. H: So I moved to Pittsburgh in May 2002 after being quite fed up with my other college. I moved in with my pals from high school, enrolled at Pitt and was ready for the fun to start rolling in. I also really wanted to meet some awesome guy because I was sick of being single and all that so I tested out that thing called online dating. Literally within days of being in Pittsburgh I had a prospect who called me on the phone one night after talking online for about 10 minutes. Yeah it wasn’t a gradual thing where we talked for weeks before deciding to talk on the phone, and finally meet. I agreed to meet him the next day, knowing basically nothing about him. I did have a picture though! I did all the things you aren’t supposed to do in the online dating world, such as letting him pick me up at my house (knows where I live), going to his house where he lives alone (hey, he could be a murderer), let him cook me dinner (could have been poisoned). Anyways, it was a bit impulsive for me, but it turned out to be kind of cool because we started dating seriously and had a great relationship. Three years and some months later … not as peachy as it used to be and I don’t even know if we are still together. I’m having this feeling that its turning into Mr. E all over again, but I’m destined to let it happen because of that nasty little thing called love.

The End … for now. I still have 18 letters left before I have to start using numbers or Greek symbols. 😛

Happy Labor Day! This morning I decided to go to 7-11 and get my Labor Day picnic hotdog. I do not have anywhere to go to eat some real hot dogs today, so 7-11 was my alternative. Plus I was craving a hotdog for some reason and I was starving this morning. I haven’t eaten much lately, and most nights I have been going to sleep craving potato salad and candybars. I had this idea that I might lose some weight if I stop eating at 11pm. Forget eating healthy food ….. my new idea is to eat whatever I want, just not a lot of it and not late at night. So far I’ve lost 7 pounds and am now below my weight when I went to the beach …. which by the way was nowhere near the “hot bikini girl” weight. But anyways. So I was quietly getting my hotdog. First I squirted some ketchup and mustard on it, then I lifted the lid on the onion bin to put some onions on it. Suddenly I hear this woman go “THE OTHER WAY! THE OTHER WAY! COME ON, DON’T MAKE A MESS!!!!! FLIP IT OVER … NOW!” I’m like, “Is she talking to me?” So I turn around and she was like “Yeah, you … you are putting the lid on backwards and I don’t have time to clean up after people all day.” I was like “whatever”. All I did was flip the lid up and scoop some onions on. I didn’t mangle the lid or even take it off the whole way and it looked the same as all the other lids so I just shut it and started to walk away. So she scurries over before I can get away and goes “I can’t believe this! You put all of MY lids on backwards! What is wrong with you girl?” I respond “I did not touch your lids. Does it look like I was putting hot peppers, chili, and pickles on my hotdog?” I used the squirters for mustard and ketchup and I only touched the onion lid. She told me I had to fix them and that they were all upside down. The lids have a hole in the corner so the spoon can stick out, and they can probably go either way. So I firmly said “I didn’t touch any of those lids.” SHe was like “Well I know you did because I just changed all of these myself and you are the first person who has been over here!” So I just got irritated and flagged down the manager and told him that his employee was on crack. He went over and told her that the lids were on the right way and maybe the other girl had flipped them over. Then she got a little lesson on lids and how they work. It was pretty freakin’ hilarious. Stupid bitch. So anyways, if you ever go to 7-11 in Oakland, beware of the crackhead lid monitor. She might eat you if you touch her lids.