Outside sucks, my apartment sucks, my television sucks, my computer sucks, I’m dying of boredom and I’m going to stab someone just so I can have some entertainment around here. I’m bored with a capital B. The fuzzy boots and winter coat buying didn’t happen today. I did go to the fuzzy boots and coat store but I didn’t find anything that I liked. Tomorrow I should do laundry because I’ve run out of essential things like um underwear and towels, but if I’m going to slip on ice and get frostbitten from carrying my laundry down the street I guess I won’t. I’ll just have to be naked, and nobody should really mind since nobody sees me. I have plenty of work clothes … I’ll just have to go to work without undergarments. I’m kidding, its not really that bad, I just procrastinate about doing laundry because I hate the process. It isn’t the actual washing, drying, folding process I hate. I hate having to take my laundry to the laundromat and without a car that isn’t very fun. I used to do my laundry at Todd’s house a lot, but he didn’t even invite me to his pumpkin carving party so I doubt he’ll invite me to do my laundry anytime soon. Whatevz. I’m just cranky.
This weekend my friend is having a halloween party but I don’t know if I’m going because I don’t have a halloween costume and I don’t feel like wasting money on one. Really, I’m just not creative or motivated enough to be anything for halloween. I do enjoy halloween but ever since I can remember, I’ve dreaded the costume part. I never know what to be and no matter what I am I just feel itchy and disgusting all night. Back to the party thing. Anyways, my friend lives in a confusing place that would be a miracle if I got there in the first place without getting lost, and after some drinking and fun times I’d be left on my own to return in the night of Pittsburgh and I’d probably just get raped or murdered because I’m scared of Pittsburgh in the dark unless I’m in familiar territory, like Oakland. I could also just stay over night, but I don’t like sleeping at other peoples places. I could go along with someone, that isn’t really the problem. I think I just lack halloween spirit this year. Oh well.
I’ve really got to get out for the day tomorrow. I was out for about two hours today, trying to shop but I just got hot and sweaty in the store and wanted to start stabbing people because my discomfort was making me irritable and I felt gross. I hate this time of year because the ratio of outside to inside temperature is terrible. I’m freezing outside but once I get inside I start sweating and want to rip off my clothes. And everytime something touches me my hair just turns into an electric ball of static and I just want to scream! I should probably do some grocery shopping tomorrow even though I despise doing that too. I just hate everything this week. I don’t know why. I’m just not very happy because I’m feeling so damn frustrated about life and all of the little things are really getting to me. Like spilling coffee or having static in my hair. Normally its no big deal, but I just want to have a temper tantrum and rip someones head off and scream bloody fucking murder. Even though I wouldn’t do it cause I’m not really a murderer. And if I ripped your head off, I’m guessing you’d be kind of dead. I think these Jewish Holidays are getting to me. Maybe I need to go back to work. And maybe I’m a hypocrite and contradict everything I say, but hey I’m a walking contradiction and I ain’t got no right. Yeah!
I’m cranky today too! Someone I know keeps referring to their ‘blonde’ hair. Come on man, you know it’s gray, I know it’s gray, give it up.