Sometimes I feel like I live in a boarding house. Since I have moved into this house about 6 months ago I have acquired two new roommates and lost two. The good thing about it: I now have my own mailbox on the answering machine … I’m #2. I doubt I’ll ever make it to #1 on the mailbox because the owner is #1 and if he decides to move out he’ll probably take his answering machine with him.
I live with three guys and I thought it was going to be a pig-pen around here. To my surprise, this is the cleanest place I have ever lived. Surprise! Not all guys are pigs. I know that Todd keeps his place clean, but I thought he was just weird. So, back to the boarding house issue. See, here in the big blue house on Stanton Ave, roommates do not talk much to one-another. We are not a fun community/family here. Not that I mind, really. I like it that way.
I live in a four-bedroom house, with a kitchen, a living-room, a bathroom, and a huge-ass basement that scares me. I have three male roommates and sometimes they scare me too.
Roommate 1: 23 year old white male.
He is the owner of the house and is trying to make a living on Real Estate and construction.
Upside:He is tall, medium brown hair, quite good looking. He is extremely nice and he keeps the house well stocked with toilet paper, paper-towel, cleaning supplies, and garbage bags. Not to mention fast-internet, and super-cable.
Downside: I’m afraid he is going to lecture me for not going to church on Sunday. Christian all the way, loves God too much. Listens to God music, listens to God radio, watches God TV.
Roommate 2: 22 year old black male.
He moved in about a month after I did. He goes to grad school.
Upside: Not here much, keeps to himself, 99% sure he is gay so I don’t have to worry about being molested.
Downside: Always closes the bathroom door and makes me think someone is in there. Talks loudly on his cell-phone and says “Oh my Gawd girlfriend” way too much.
Roommate 3: 22 year old white male.
He moved in last month. Goes to ITT Tech, works at Taco Bell.
Upside: He talks to me (first talking roommate). He also understands how much it sucks to not have laundry facilities here.
Downside: Buys 40 frozen Banquet dinners at once and monopolizes the freezer. (Hello, they are always 10 for $10 … no need to buy so many!). He is scary and people call for him at 4am. He is from Mississippi and talks weird. He gets mad a lot. He yells a lot. He is definitely NOT hot. I might get ill if I accidentally saw him naked. Doesn’t make living with guys more fun.
Roommate 4: (yes I’m critiquing myself!) 22 year old white female.
She graduated from college and she works at a Pizza shop.
Upside: Quiet, doesn’t complain, has a lot of kitchen supplies.
Downside: Leaves TV on all night long, Alarm clock goes off every 10 minutes for hours, leaves bags of bread on kitchen table until green, smells like pizza.
HOUSE: Big blue house on Stanton Ave.
Upside: Clean, warm, spacious bedrooms, good water pressure, clean bathroom, toilet flushes nicely, free cable, free internet, free heat, free water, free phone, free garbage, free toilet paper! Free free free rocks.
Downside: No kitties allowed, no laundry on-site, doors never locked, always bugs in the kitchen sink(in the summer) hmmm … guess that is it.
NEIGHBORHOOD: Highland Park/East Liberty.
Upside: There are trees on my street and squirrels in my yard. My street is quiet. I don’t hear sirens 24/7 anymore, in fact I don’t think I ever hear sirens.
Downside: Where do I begin! I live in “da hood”. A few months ago someone was shot and killed only a few feet from my front porch. It is definitely not somewhere to be out and about at night. The neighborhood Sunoco down the street has a sign that says “No hoods please, thank you in advance”, and you have to pay for your merchandise through a bullet proof encasing around the cash-registers. Livin’ in da ghetto, whoo!