Coffeebration

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Hello! I?m a little sad that my awesome four day weekend is over, but I had a fun-filled Fourth o?July weekend. I went to FC on Friday after work and basically did nothing that night. I was stinky and tired, so I talked to my mom and went to bed early since I knew I had to get up super early the next day. Saturday, I woke up at 7am and electrocuted myself. I think I?m going to save that for the ?highlights? section. My parents and I went to some garage sales and I got some picture frames, a coffee cup, a coffeemaker (with bugs), a sprinkler for my dad ?.. and not one, but TWO Dolly Surprise! Dolly Surprise was my ultimate favorite doll when I was a kid. Her hair grows and then you can crank her arm and make it short again. Once short, you release the other arm and it magically grows! I was quite happy ? especially since they only cost a nickel each! Yay!! We came back around 9am to watch the famous 5k racers whiz past the house. I have to give a congrats to my brother and cousin, who raced neck to neck and both finished just under 24 minutes! I?m impressed. Who knew my family was so talented! After the race we ventured around to some more sales and eventually came back and ate some lunch at the park. I did some shopping and went to the parade and watched fire trucks and bands march on down the street. It was a festive day!

On Sunday, I visited with my grandmother and ate a tasty lunch consisting of chicken tenders and potato salad. I also got some super early birthday presents from her ? lots of cool stuff like shirts, socks, fancy undies, and lotion-stuff. After that I came home and went to the park with my parents where I feasted upon the polish platter and my parents made friends with some weird people. Hummdee dum. Walked around, went home. On Sunday night, my parents and I sat on the back porch and drank some flavored zimas and watched people setting off fireworks. That was fun too.

Monday was the 4th and it was HOTT. My dad and I went to the park and ate shaved ice cause we were HOTT. That is about all I did during the day. Later Todd came up joined my parents and I onto the FC trail to watch the fireworks show. I was MOST impressed this year. FC?s fireworks show will be ranking up there with the ones in this city real soon. After the show I came back to my apartment with an exercise bike in tow (it is my new get in shape toy!). I?m quite excited about the exercise bike.

On Tuesday, I attempted to rearrange my apartment to accommodate the exercise bike and it totally got out of hand. I had to recruit some help from Todd who pretty much re-routed all of my wires and set everything back up. He also helped me move a couch into the little storage room because there is just not enough room for two couches, a bike and a computer desk in my living room. Now everything is in order but I seriously did some damage to my back. It better get better so I can begin cycling soon.

Here are some highlights from my weekend that I did not mention in the summary ….. exciting things sure do happen when I leave my apartment/box:

I broke the coffeemaker on Saturday morning. The red button that turns it on and off popped out when I pushed it into the ?on position?. I put my finger inside the hole where the button was to get the spring and I electrocuted myself.

Later, at the garage sales, I bought a coffeemaker off of a girl I went to high school with and never recognized her until we were pulling out and I saw the name on the mailbox. I felt dumb, oh well ? maybe she didn?t remember me either. I haven?t seen these people in six years ?. And everyone looks different! Anyways, the coffeemaker ended up being infested with bugs and dirt ? I ran vinegar water through it three times and every single time huge clumps of pebbles and insect legs were coming out. I kid you not.

On the 4th of July I saw my ex-boyfriend getting a stroller out of his car but I didn?t see his baby. He was wearing the same ?Aiken? Jersey that he wore in 1999. I later whipped off every single car that came past me with headlights on. Hello, it was fireworks gathering spot and tons of people were standing there. I felt I needed to be rude. I also threw a glass bottle on the ground and got severely scolded by Todd because a truck almost ran it over.

I got to see the destruction site of my old bank in FC. It was cool because you could see the big concrete safe and the vault door. And there is now a place in FC called Nellie?s. I heard that they sell old women?s clothing though. Not so cool.

My dad gave me an exercise bike that he got from a neighbor. It is really super nice and it counts calories burned, mph, and time lapsed. It also has handles so your arms move back and forth while you pedal. I will now probably shut up for a while about wanting a treadmill for a while. I would have to build a gym. And my apartment is too small for one more ounce of stuff.

And the highlight of today was a phone call I received at work from a guy who seems to think I will be able to contact the ex-prime minister of a country I will not name, but will say that they are sort of in a war right now. Anyways, he thinks I can contact this guy and tell him that his mother is willing to let this guy come live with her in the United States. He gave me her address and phone number, and apparently she is now awaiting the Prime Ministers phone call to accept the invitation. Ok.

I?m also excited to say that Todd got a King bed and some new bedroom furniture, and hooked up the AC in his room, so I think I?m moving into his bed. It is very nice!!

That is all for now. This is the longest update I have created in a long time!

Oh where oh where is Natalee Holloway? Many posters on Scared Monkeys are now seriously speculating that a weird Pagan religious group witnessed what happened to Natalee one month ago, but will not go to authorities because the cops are “dirty”. Instead, someone calling himself “Shango” is leaving poetic clues and people are lining up to translate this crap into meaningful clues ….. give me a break. Of course I will look stupid if this turns out to be true, but seriously …. seems a bit far-fetched. I’ve watched “On the Record” with Greta VanSusteren every single night for weeks … and nothing really makes sense. I don’t think anyone really knows how she just disappeared into thin air. I have some theories, but I really don’t think the Pagan group is sending the Scared Monkeys clues. Way too bizarre. And I could go on for days about this and other current events, but I’m tired from my crazy night – saving it for another post. So goodnight.

Whoo yahoo, stormy storms everywhere. Guess who isn’t going to the laundromat tonight as planned? Instead it will be coffee and pizza …. cleaning my apartment and putting on a new layer of bug death spray everywhere. Something was flying in my apartment the other day and I did not like that. In addition, I almost had a heart attack when I jumped into the shower the other morning and found out that I wasn’t alone! Huge ass daddy long-legs spider was desperately trying to escape the water. I jumped out and screamed and then used a flip flop to push him down the drain. I just started singing the “Itsy bitsy spider song” in my head.

I have 960 emails in my inbox. Greater power, please help me. I need someone to do a massive overhaul of everything in my life. I wish paper was illegal. I also wish pointless emails were illegal. Emails need to be regulated by the government so that each person should only be allowed to send 2 emails per day to the same person. If this rule is broken, sender will be thrown into a pit of molten lava.

Ok, I’m not happy to say ….. 20 minutes has now lapsed and I have 847 emails in my inbox. It is like a lost cause. I don’t know where to begin. I know I need to save the attachments on some of them, forward some, put some in folders …… what to do. I know, I’m going home.

Hurrah, I got a raise at work today. News of more money made my headache disappear. It is not much, but I’ll take it. It is better than nothing. In other unrelated news …. not much. I’m feeling pretty insignificant today. Maybe my eyes are two different colors, or I just don’t exist. Maybe both. Wow, two updates in one day. I’m on a roll. Better end this before I get carried away. Bye.

Guess what. I don’t sleep in my bed. Ever. I don’t use my bedroom at all unless somone stays over, and in that case I sleep in my bed. I used to like my bedroom, but lately I’ve been having bedroom anxiety. My entire apartment is kind of escape-routless … but especially my bedroom. No door to the outside world, no windows, no way to escape. Should I wake up in the middle of the night to flames shooting towards me on my couch, I could probably hop on top of the couch and wedge myself out of the half window that is there.

I also have less nightmares on my couch. Maybe my bed is possessed with an evil nightmare spirit. If so, he attacked my couch last night. I’m not going to go on and on, but last night I had the worst dream. I was dead but nobody knew. Everyone could see me and I looked normal, but day by day I was rotting and getting weaker. Todd knew. He said I had to take a shower because I smelled. But I had just taken a shower! And even though I kept showering, I was still greasy and stinky looking. And my hair was falling out in clumps. I don’t know how I died, but I was dead. And I was completely freaked out and praying and praying that I was dreaming and I would wake up. Then I realized it wasn’t a dream. It had been days and nobody could have a dream that lasted for days. Then I woke up on my couch at 6:30 am and still didn’t know if it was a dream. Anyways, I didn’t go back to sleep.

Are nightmares bad for your health? I mean, I had to be totally freaking out with my heart pounding rapidly. Do you think it is possible to have a dream that is so scary that you die from it? I know it is possible to die from fear, I think. I’m fearful of dreams like that.

I also have a massive headache today, which isn’t helping me feel better about my bad dream. Work is sucking today too. I need to do laundry sometime before my apartment starts to rot from having too much dirty laundry in it. I’m not disgusting, really.

I’m going to the family this weekend to watch parades and go to yard sales. Hopefully sleeping in a nice air conditioned room with a bed … and windows. That will be nice.